Friendships after Motherhood

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Friendships after Motherhood

Friendships after Motherhood

Your friendships will never be the same they said. You’ll lose your friends others said. I said that’s not going to happen to me! Don’t worry it didn’t, lol. But the truth is, they did change. Not negatively at least. But they changed in a way that it took a year to put into perspective…

Cirque de symphonie

This past weekend we went to a new show to us, Cirque de symphonie! You see every year, it is tradition to see a ballet, the Nutcracker to be specific in December. We always dress up! Something about putting a dress and long coat to go downtown makes us very excited! This year one of my best friends suggested doing something different as we probably have memorized the nutcracker by now, lol. Well it was a fabulous show! The orchestra played heavenly Christmas music while dancers and artists performed their act. It was humorous and very entertaining! We loved it so much we are returning in a couple of months for a different show. We arrived and went straight to the bar for our beloved chardonnay. I think that is tradition by now as well. We toasted to being out again and searched for our seats. As I sat there a little warm I’ll admit since I don’t have an opportunity to drink anymore, I was in awe. Not just of the show but how wonderful I felt. I wanted to cry. I was sitting there, like old times with two of the most amazing women that I have called my best friends for almost a decade now. Could it have been the wine? A little bit, lol but the truth of the matter is I had been so worried over these friendships that I was in such internal joy to realize that it wasn’t going to occur. Not now at least and especially not  because I became a mom.

In the beginning

I had my doubts at first. I’ve said it enough times now, motherhood was and is not easy to me. I REALLY struggled in the beginning. I made the mistake one day about a week after having my son of saying along the lines of, “I just want some privacy.” While referencing the many visitors I had recently. Well they took it for what it was and let’s just say I didn’t see them for a little while. I should have said; please help! Will you bring me more Starbucks and lunch? Or keep me company and encourage me to get fresh air or refill my gigantic water cup? I don’t know what was going through my mind. I was overwhelmed to say the least. They tried their best. They asked how I was and even ran out to the store for new pjs for my new little bundle of joy. Gosh to do it all over again.

Misunderstanding

My biggest fear was that we couldn’t relate any longer. Neither one had children and if we are being honest with not very many kids around them. Until my own, I didn’t either, lol. “You are screwed!” I was told. Ha ha. “We will figure it out together! Like when Miranda had Brady!” Was my response. We are Sex and the City fanatics by the way. And we did. My mistake was assuming they knew what my needs were. I cried to my wife (I cried a lot during those times) asking why I didn’t hear from them as much as I liked. “Don’t they know I’m struggling?” But no, they didn’t. They weren’t mind readers. They weren’t sure if I wanted space, privacy, or time. Time to adjust to motherhood. My new routine, normal. When we got together I expressed my feelings and they were very receptive. But then again why wouldn’t they? These are my best friends. The women that helped me in my wedding dress and stood by my side on the second happiest day of my life (the birth of our son is the first.) They have seen me at my best and my worst. I can call them at 3 a.m. and without hesitation or question will be at my door if I needed them. I can tell them anything and they wouldn’t judge me. Okay maybe a little lol but they love me and support me unconditionally.

The realization

Friendships thrive and fail depending on what you invest in them. Motherhood doesn’t change. Your priorities do. Therefore if you make your friendships a priority like you do your child (dren) and your spouse, you will always have them. Like any relationship, they need attention and nourishment. Also clear communication. Don’t expect people to read your mind. I always say, they can’t fix what they don’t know is wrong.

To my two best friends, motherhood has changed me. Thank you for loving my son like your own nephew. For entertaining him, throwing him celebrations and pushing the stroller for me. I appreciate your patience as I live by his nursing and nap schedule, lol. I would be so incomplete without you.

“They say nothing lasts forever; dreams change, trends come and go, but friendships never go out of style.” -Carrie Bradshaw

Love,

Angelica

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My Winter Love for Jord

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My Jord Watch

Photography by Jill Shaw.

My Jord Watch
Watch Gift Ideas

Listen mamas an outfit just isn’t an outfit unless you accessorize, let’s be honest. From the earrings to the necklace to the arm bling! Not just one but all three! And this Valentine’s is no exception to be prepared.  I haven’t revealed what I am wearing just yet but I do know what accessories I am wearing and that is what I will share with you today.

My Jord watch.

It is called Zebra and Rose! Exotic right? It is made of natural wood, sapphire crystal glass and adorns with Swarovski crystal markers. In love! Not to mention rose, my favorite color. 😍 It is feminine, elegant, classy and flirty; everything a watch should be. I was so excited when this baby arrived in the mail that I snapped a picture (or a few, let’s be honest) and sent it off to my best friends and wife immediately.

Now how am I wearing it?

If you have been following me for a little bit, you know that I love to color coordinate. In my opinion, warm colors go with warm and cold with cold, I don’t typically mix them. Therefore since the wood is naturally brown and the details gold, I will wear a warm color clothing item such a cream, tan, brown, maroon and reds. Are you seeing my vision?

The Giveaway!

I am giving one lucky winner a $100 credit to their very own Jord watch! Enter HERE. You will get a $25 code just for entering! That’s it!

The Perfect Valentine’s Gift

Jord also has very classy men’s watches. You can take a look at the men’s collection  here. You can view the women’s here. There is still time to get it before Valentine’s Day! If you have any questions feel free to ask below in the comments and stay tuned for more V-Day holiday styling tips.

 

Love,

Angelica

*This post was sponsored by Jord Wood watched. As always my thoughts and opinions are 100% my own.

How Angelica got her groove back

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31 weeks pregnant in heels

I wasn’t always put together believe it or not. That’s another “perk” about motherhood. Putting yourself together is a lot more work. You see I have always been the type of girl who puts on make up just to go to the mailbox. I was the type of girl always in heels no matter what. Always with earrings and a necklace even if it was to go to the grocery store. Now to tell you the truth, I am somewhere in between.

I said I wouldn’t be that mom. You know, the one in yoga pants and a messy bun. I was determined to be Victoria Beckham always very well put together. I also thought that I would have my baby peacefully sleep in his carrier while mommy had breakfast with her besties. Did you just laugh at me? Yeah I did as well. I was naive. I gave birth and due to my c section, all pants bothered me. Yes, even yoga pants. So I lived in nursing gowns (two to be exact) to what seemed eternity. Now my first non negotiable was a shower. I had to shower no matter what, every single night. If I couldn’t look nice, I was at least going to smell nice, lol. My next was putting my hair up neatly. Since I couldn’t straighten or curl my hair, I would put it up in a neat bun or pony with lots of hair spray. I will be honest and say I am envious of a woman who can pull off a cute, messy bun however. My wavy, frizzy, hair type doesn’t allow me to. I would look like a lion if I attempted. Believe me I have tried. 😂 Now let’s discuss footwear, I wore heels until I was 38 weeks pregnant. I mean, 4 inch stilettos or wedges A LOT. So frequent, I had everyone alarmed at all times. I love my heels. Back then, the VERY high pump was sooo in, I can’t believe I could even balance. On a side note, I don’t know what to do with about 10 pairs of pumps that are now irrelevant. How was I suppose to know the trend would end as quickly as my pregnancy? I digress.

Well as I recovered, I was fortunate to lose the baby weight immediately. I had gained 30 pounds when it was all said and done and lost probably half of it two days after birth. I was still very swollen and my stomach muscles shot from surgery therefore I could only wear two sizes larger in jeans comfortably. Luckily I found a couple of my wife’s that I would borrow in that mean time. I wore them everywhere as my “real” clothes. This is also where I discovered  flat boots. I didn’t even own ONE pair. I know I know, if you follow my instagram this may also come as a shocker to you. I wore my wifes two pairs of boots at this time. So that was my new-found style, flat, leather boots, 2 sizes larger jeans, an over sized sweater over a nursing tank and a neat, high bun stiff with hair spray. I put on simple earrings, sprayed a dash of perfume and off I went. Most likely only to our doctor visits, lol. That’s the next part, I didn’t go out.

I confined myself and our son due to in my head shielding him for the many germs and scary viruses such a RSV! If I could go back, I would have definitely gone out more. Again, probably somewhere in between what I did and going out as normal because  I don’t think that’s good either. I say all this because it played such a large factor in finding myself and in return my style. The more I sheltered us, the more my PPD( or strong baby blues) was harder to come out of. You see in order to find yourself, you must be happy with yourself again. I wasn’t. I no longer had any time for me. This tiny baby was attached to my breast all day and all night, I couldn’t just get ready the way I used to. I have since mastered doing it all in lightning fast speed. I can straighten my hair as quickly as he brushes his teeth. I can put on make up as he plays with the hairbrush and put clothes on while I give him a book on the floor of my closet. Never in my wildest dreams did I picture this. Of course on the weekends my wife takes him so I can get ready without needing to have one eye on him at all times. I am in such auto pilot however, that I still rush through it even to this day.

I’m not sure when it clicked. But one day I had my long big curls back, blush and even a necklace. My size 2 jeans fit like a glove again and I even put on lipstick. One thing I kept were the flat boots. I received my very own pair last Christmas and I had added a few to my collection since. Afterall, running after a hyper toddler in heels isn’t realistic anymore. Not to mention he is 24 pounds  heavy. I reserve heels for going out such as dinner or a party. You know what? I am okay with that. Evolution is more than okay. It is natural. My style has evolved over the years and I am certain it will continue to do so. I just hope that I can always remain true to myself and a little more than the non negotiates. You know like that daily shower 😉. When did you get your groove back? Or did you never lose it?

Love,

Angelica

 

Style after maternity

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Style after maternity

Style after maternity

Style after maternity

Style after maternity

Style after maternity

Style after maternity

Style after maternity

Style after maternity.

Style after maternity

Style after maternity

Style after maternity

Style after maternity

Photography taken by Jill Shaw.

I remember when I was pregnant it was so important to wear MODERN clothes that were flattering, stylish, comfortable and feminine. One of my favorite shops of all time is Pink Blush.  They fit all of the criteria I want. Their clothes make me feel beautiful and classy. What’s even better is  that I am still wearing their clothes after pregnancy. Yup, you heard correctly, they are not just a maternity line. They have beautiful clothes for after pregnancy as well that are even nursing friendly. I love that I can nurse my son anywhere in a dress! I become frustrated if I have to confine myself to a room to nurse because I have to take off a dress therefore I am so happy to I don’t worry about that any longer. The quality of their clothes is above my high standards, lasting me for long periods of time. Seriously mamas, my Pink Blush clothes still look brand new. This dress I am wearing has a thick yet light fabric that I feel like twirling in it all day, lol. The floor  length creates elegance and the v neck gives a hint of sexy. You can find the dress here.

I have also partnered with Pink Blush to give a $50 Gift card to one lucky follower. Here are the rules.

1. You must subscribe to angelicacastaneda.com

2. You must follow me @angelicacastaneda_

3. You must follow @shoppinkblush

You may also tag 1-3 friends for additional entries.

You must not have won a Pink Blush in the past 3 months to be eligible. Goodluck everyone!

Love,

Angelica

*This post was sponsored by Pink Blush Maternity. As always all thoughts and opinions are 100% my own.